Blogging – how not to do it.

So at 0530 on Friday 25th May I seized conciousness with both hands and planted a big, wet, sloppy kiss on it. I then realised I was in the shower. After stumbling out, cold, wet and I’m pretty certain, naked I towled myself off and started preparing for what was to be 6 hours of driving. Our destination? Edinburgh. Our reason? A wedding, namely my cousin’s. It was also a chance for Lexxie’s dad to see her before her birthday today. So at 0630 we left our home and set off on the M5 North. Birmingham was the usual circus but nothing we hadn’t seen before and by 1300 we had caught the sight of a castle jutting out from an ancient volcanic plug and the familiar sight of the extinct volcano itself. We were back in Edinburgh. We visitied my grandparents, my mother and then Kai’s mother. We dropped the kids off at 1700, saw my father and went for dinner with my mother. Dinner was vegetarian, hand cooked but vegetarian. I am not a vegetarian. We have a fridge full of meat just for bbq season. However, it was still a good meal. Afterwards was a trip back to Kai’s mothers and bed for me. I was exhausted.

Saturday 26th.

Conciousness called me back. Kai was awake and heading for the shower. I lay in bed and read a bit of my book. I then took my turn under the constant fall of nice, hot, water. I quickly dressed in my suit. The wedding was in 5 hours and we still needed to go collect my mother and sister. Kai eventually joined me downstairs and damn me but she looked radiant. I was very, very impressed. Her gran was as stunned as I. We left her mother’s home and went to the Savacentre (I needed a tie, I forgot mine here at home). We then had a quick lunch at mother’s and left for the wedding. It was at the Mansfield Traquair. A very impressive place. After a very quick wedding (2 hymns and a vow) we were taking pictures, congratulating the newly weds and watching the room get setup for the reception (yes it was in the same place). The dinner and dance were exquisite, people revelled in the joy of the day and the happiness of the couple. We saw a lot of family, Kai got to hold my cousin Stefano’s and his wife Jane’s 6 month old son, Luca. He is a fantastic wee lad, healthy, happy and very good. We left the wedding at about 2230 and went briefly to the Auld Hoose, shared a drink with Angus, said some hi’s and then drove back to the wedding at 2330. We then hung around until 0030 and then drove Jane and Stef home before returning to Dalkieth and our beds.

Sunday 27th

Sunday was a day for chilling. We spent the morning doing very little, drove to Tescos then onto my fathers. After an hour or so and some teas we went on to my grandmothers for lunch. I’d forgotten how big Italian lunches were. I can’t eat like I used to. We helped her tidy up then went to Gorgie and met up with Will, Keith and Adam. Card games ensued as we chatted, laughed and generally caught up. We gave Will a lift to the cinema and returned to Kai’s mothers. The kids were due to be dropped off at 2000 (about and hour) after we arrived. We chilled with Kai’s mum and stepdad. Ordered a chinese which was so-so and waited for the sprogs. They soon turned up. After a quick bath (to rid them of the smoke smells) they settled into watch Sat’s Dr Who before bed. We stuck up until about 2300 then I retired, Kai soon followed.

Monday 28th

We were woken at about 0930 and set about dealing with the kids. The plan was to spend the morning with Kai’s mum. Which we did. At 1230 we left for town to sort out Lexxie’s birthday present. We parked in Castle Street and wandered over. Lexxie went nuts when she started picking her bear’s skin, her heart, her clothes and her accessories. Soon we had a little Rose-May. Lexxie was extremely happy. The store got everyone to sing happy birthday to her too. Tom got a small bear too on the premise he’d do extra chores upon getting home. We then left, visited my uncle’s shop, had a coffee with him and then met up with Keith. We had another coffee with him and then gave my sister a lift to my gran’s. It was time to start saying our goodbyes. After my gran’s it was off to see my father. Then a short stop at Tescos petrol station and back to Kai’s mums. We found dinner cooking, we were grateful and slightly annoyed, we were supposed to cook. It was still kind of her uncle though. We chatted with him and with her step dad. Sorted things out, put the kids to bed, waited up for her mum and then we too retired.

Tuesday 29th

We drove home. Traffic Jams between Stafford and Birmingham. Enough said really. We got in at 1800 and just collapsed in a heap. Work beckoned for me in the morning.

Wednesday 30th

I came, I saw, I worked. I went to the cinema. Lexxie was bouncing, enjoying her birthday. We watched Pirates of the Carribean 3. It was good. Gyarr! Much better than the second one imho. Now we’re home. We’ve eaten cake and the birthday girl is in bed. Thats it for me I think. Work again tomorrow.

I’ve been busy and not so busy the last few days. I’ve seen friends, tidied, worked, played computer games, ran mini rpg sessions, cooked, dealt with smalls, watched movies, played card games, worked some more, watched a hell of a lot of you tube (grr), caught up on some fantasy reading (not that sort you filthy minded heathens! Oh right, I am a filthy minded heathen, nevermind then) and listened to music. I’ve been so busy that I found some solice in this quote:

“God put me on Earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I’m so far behind I will never die!” – Unknown

However I may have found a cure or possible curse (anyone else notice that the only difference between a cure and a curse is a misplaced ’s’?) to this with my wild experimentation….Coffee. Terry Pratchett was plainly talking about the effect this stuff has when he described Knurd and Klatchian Coffee.

I had my first dose of this stuff (£2 a bag at my local Sainsburys) at about 2pm today, I’m still buzzing. Now given I drink on average an 8 cup Cafetiere twice a day every weekday, I’m no stranger to the coffee kick. However I only had half a pot of this stuff and it’s still working….. I’ve stopped twitching quite as much but dang what a rush! At least I’m not a deranged caffeine addicted spider…..(the side image shows caffeine’s effects on spids….)
Currently I’m waiting for the truck load of caffeine to wear off and hit me….which led me to the next quote:

“If everything is coming your way then you’re in the wrong lane.” - Unknown

I’m hoping I’ll change lanes before the high wears off…

Oh and feel free to share some quotes you feel are amusing or approriate in my comments.

Amish Paradise Weird Al Music Vid.

Smells Like Nirvana Weird Al Music Vid.

Like A Surgeon Weird Al Music Vid.

Tom Lehrer 1 – Video of the man himself in concert…. (Part 1 of 2)

Tom Lehrer 2 – (Part 2 of 2)

Type O Negative – I Don’t Wanna Be Me

Over the Hills and Far Away – Nightwish

Phantom Of The Opera – Nightwish (Fanmade video but not bad….)

Sonne mmmm Fairy tales…but they do make such fun vids!

Ok thats enough from me. Feel free to comment up you’re favourite vids on you tube and I’ll watch em and post a comment on it myself.

Last night I went out on a scouting mission, my aim – to find out what consitituted a rock club for our new home.

Wanting to push my luck I donned my kilt, slipped on a good Cyberdog T-shirt, my flashy belt and my long coat. Kai approved of the outfit. Shortly after my ride turned up, our friend T had offered to be my Gurkha guide for the evening – along with her bf coming up for the weekend from London. So, a cup of tea and a short chat later and we were on our way….to her house. We had to wait for the bf to arrive first. The wait was not a long one and we had some red wine and conversation to help pass the time. When he did arrive T. went and got into her ‘hiking’ gear and I sat and chatted with the bloke. I was impressed, he reminds me of Red Phil of Edinburgh, but with a longer beard! Overall a very nice bloke. Oh and he’s not the messiah!
Anyway, I digress, we all piled into the man’s car and set off to the fabled Shangri-la, also known as the 2 Pigs…
We arrived just after 10pm, I think. I was introduced to a few people very friendly people, all good, but that was after I got stopped by the club’s doorman…..

Dm: ‘You a true Scotsman?’
Me: ‘Aye. Any problem with that?’
Dm: ‘Ah’m no trying to be funny, and I don’t want a look to prove it.’
Me: ‘Thats ok with me.’
DM: ‘Where you from?’
Me: ‘Edinburgh’
Dm: ‘Oh god, I’m from Glenrothes…’

He let me in after that… I can’t seem to escape them, even down here.
And yes, I normally do wander around as a true Scotsman when I wear my kilt. Well, Kai’s never complained

Anyway, the club, yes, drinks were ok, pretty standard stuff, people were friendly, all good there. Layout, reminded me a little of Opium in Edinburgh, (upstairs and a downstairs), though dancefloors on both. Downstairs was more the metal, stuff like NIN and Marilyn Manson. Upstairs (and annoyingly, I didn’t make it up there) was the Goth/EBM/Industrial floor. I had a good time out overal, and I’d recommend it for other visitors if they are down when it’s on. T’s bf gave me a lift home after the night out. Kai was already in bed by the time I staggered in.

Police officer: Yaw rite?
Driver: ‘maw rite.
Yeshoor?
Aye.
Zisyoors?
Zwitmine ?
Ris caur
Sibrurn laws
Wers heeren?
Raboozers.
Yebeen garglin’?
Jissa cupple.
Yur stoatin’.
Naw’mno’
Ye urstoatin’
Umnoe.
Geezyer licence.
‘Vno Goatwan.
Geroot racaur.
Whiffur?
‘Mapolis.
Ommigoad.
Geroot Ren.
Awrite, ‘mcomin’
Blawintaethis.
‘Mgonny Besik.
Noanme Yurno.
‘Mawrite Noo.
Getna Paddywagon.
Wer Wigaun?
Ra Jile.
Ohmigoad, rawife’ll murder me.
Getna Wagon.
Aw, Neveragain.
Ratsit furme.

Comments on a postcard with your translations….

Oh and for this one I’ll be screening your comments, I’ll post them later, promise but I want to see how well you understand this missing link dialect…

The very secret diaries of Lord of the Rings….

Secret Diaries

When we first moved down here I used to spend most of my Sundays making a family roast and I do mean the full works – stuffing, roast potatoes, mixed veg, gravy….mmmmmm. This slackened off though in the new year due to time constraints and the fact that we got a bit busier. Today I’m starting slow towards a build up and I’m making a traditional italian pasta sauce – in other words I started making it at midnight last night – the sauce requires a good few hours of simmering it should be ready for tonight, though I doubt it will be as good as my grandmothers!

So Friday I had another half day – Kai isn’t sleeping well still so I came home early to help out around the house, thank god for flexi. Friday night was a pretty quiet one in all honestym, its so quiet I can’t even recall what it was we got up to exactly….I think I spent most of the night playing with my anniversary gift. One campaign down, 1 to go basically (as of last night that is).

Yesterday Kai wanted to go to the Home and Garden show at the racecourse so when we eventually arose from our torpor we sorted the kids out and piled into the car and drove down there (was about 12ish by the time we arrived). We spent about two hours wandering amongst the stands gathering a horde of baloons for the kids and trying to avoid being given hard sales by pushy sales people. We didn’t escape with our wallets intact but at least we escaped. Kai bought some vases (ones that are completely flat but gain shape when you water) and some towels (we needed new ones). Then due to the kids we spent another £10 in the cafe – really poor value for money imho- on a sandwich, 2 teas, 2 hot chocolates and a pair of twixs. We had a nice wander round the garden show area – Kai admired plants, hammocks and lawn ornaments, saw the bird of prey area (very cute owl) and then we fled the scene. Our next stop was Tescos, we had a fair bit of trouble from Lexxie at Tescos but we soon got everything sorted and the shopping done. I got the stuff to make my sauce for today and we completed stocking up our ‘man-fridge’ (so named by myself as it’s where I’m keeping all the bbq foods and beer….). We then came home. Kai then made the suggestion of a wander down to the Norwood Arms (local pub) for a plate of chips and a pint out in their garden area. So we went. I really enjoyed that, Lexxie on the other hand decided to be a wee menace again – so after our first pint it was time to take her home. Kai then decided that she wanted a trip to Ikea – it was 430pm by this point and the closest Ikea is at least an hour away. So I said no, I felt that Lexxie had been enough of a handful yesterday that I didn’t want to go far with her, that and it was nearing time to make dinner and the kids would whine and whinge until they were fed….. Turns out she really wanted a hammock, some pretty things and some candles. So I offered a compromise, I’d take her to BnQ, Homebase, Argos or Focus to get her hammock and we’d go to Ikea on Monday (its a bank holiday). After some to-ing and fro-ing we finally agreed that this is what we’d do. By 630pm we were home from Focus with a rocking sun lounger and once again Lexxie and Tom had been sent to their rooms for bad behaviour (just one of those days – they’d not been too bad the last few days beforehand). We then started to make our dinner. We’d bought 4 pizza bases, various toppings, sauce, and plenty of cheese. The kids got called in one at a time to help choose their toppings, then Kai and I made our own. We got them into the oven just in time to setlle in and watch Dr Who. The kids were called in and allowed to watch this despite their behaviour. It was an ok episode, not their best but it was ok. Kai was a bit disappointed to find our Eurovision had bumped it for a week but hey, we may get another Lordi! So kinders went back to bed after eating dinner and Kai and I settled in for the night. She went off to do some writing and I finished off the GDI campaign of my anniversary gift. Kai did come down and join me and whilst I was preparing my pasta sauce, she had another go at the NOD campaign (she secretly rather enjoys RTS games ). At 130am we collapsed in bed.

So what’s everyone else been upto?

Yesterday Kai and I talked, we talked and talked, we exhausted ourselves with words. Then we went out for dinner. We went to Frankie and Bennies, we ate until 10pm then took the kids home to bed. It was perhaps the closest to a perfect night out we, as a family have ever come. It was a fantastic night. One I was sorry to see end. In the morning I rose from torpor, dressed, fed the kids and tookto school and then went to work.

I left work early today, at lunch time as it so happens – something I had planned to do a few days ago, sadly this meant I missed out on lunch with S but meant I got to go home home. The purpose of this blatant disregard of responsibility was so that I could spend time with my beloved. Kai and I rarely get to spend time with just each other these days, so I made of point of taking this afternoon off – and boy was it worth it. We had a couple of small errands to run but after that we spent a pleasant hour in town. We drank coffee, wandered around the shops, bought pretzels and just generally hung out. Something we haven’t done in an age to my mind. Oh sure we spent time together but the smalls generally kept us busy so it wasn’t just us. After we picked the kids up from school Kai and I took them up to the top of Crickley Hill to let them run around like maniacs whislt we renewed our handfasting. The ceremony was a simple one but one cherished by both Kai and myself. As we wandered around the green hiltop stopping on occasion to allow Kai to take some photos I began to feel tired. I wish I knew what caused it and I know it caused some concern to Kai and to this point I still can’t explain what cased such a lack of energy to befall me. So there I was, enjoying myself – as much as I can surrounded by nature with young family members present and completely exhausted. We returned home, happy with ourselves and in our renewed vows of love to one another. I prepared dinner and Kai, very kindly, cooked for us. We had fajitas, then after dinner played snakes and ladders with the kids. Kai then kept the kids out of my hair for a while – which I felt bad about, she needs her space at the moment, but I was just so exhausted that its what I needed. As I sat there playing computer games in a near vegetative state I came accorss an old yearning – one to be out in pubs and clubs. In Edinburgh I used to go out every Wednesday night to the pub and almost every fortnight to some club or another. Down here we don’t really get the opportunity to. Don’t get me wrong, I love being where I am now I just miss social interactions brought about by being within a close proximity of alchohol based beverages. Which leads me on to my next point. Turns out the local goth/alternate nightclub down here is next on, on the 11th – hopefully I’ll make it to that.

Tomorrow beckons the pair of us, sleep, topor, call it what you will pulls on us like an anchor, and it is a call we intend to answer. We’ll see what the dawn makes of the world again soon enough.

Guess what I’ve been doing?

Yesterday was fairly stressful, I had one final course to do and another issue with the car – it broke down on my way to the course – reason the fuckwit mechanics had ‘forgotten’ to replace a clip attaching the primer lead from the ignition to the starter motor solonoid. I was not impressed. I was in a red hot fury by the time I eventually got to work – 1 hour later and an RAC call out. GAH!

The course was only a day but seemed to drag out due to the fact that once again the technical content was something I felt a school leaver could manage without breaking a sweat let alone an IT graduate and technical support monkey like myself. *Sigh* My only relief from the monotony of the class was a reasonably pleasant lunch with my friend T. After work I had to collect Kai, visit the garage, shout at them, collect and re-attach my missing clip, go to B and Q as Kai wanted plants, seeds, pots and fertiliser, then race to go get groceries that had been overlooked before dashing home in a frantic rush to cook for 4 people, do the dishes and make the house (mostly the kitchen) a bit more presentable for another friend of ours S who came over to help take her mind of stuff, chill and play Mah Jong and boardgames. By the time she arrived I was fairly tired from all the running around I had done. However, we had a fantastic night, we chatted about a number of things, found out a bit more about each other, our pasts, our likes, our dislikes just getting to know each other. By the end of the evening (1130ish) S said her goodbyes and drove home. We (Kai and I) felt that we had found another really good friend and we got the feeling that it was a view shared by S. We eventually collapsed in bed after sharing a glass of mead each and sharing our mayday vows of love towards each other.

This morning I got up at 640am and got myself ready for work. My word what a day, I had piles of paperwork awaiting me – I won’t go into detail cause paperwork is dull. I was concerned over how T and S had been as they’ve both had some rough times of late. I spoke to Kai at about 11am and found out she wasn’t feeling well and also was a little down. In any case work pushed on and eventually I left for home. I called Kai before setting out and found out that she wanted me to drive us to the Asda some distance away as we needed milk and she wanted to get some Summer clothes for Lexxie. Now I’ll admit I was a bit cranky at this, I’m generally tired after a full day at the office and generally I like to relax a little before I have to cook and do the dishes for everyone. However Kai asked and I agreed to do it. THe kids had been ok today Lexxie is still a handful but I think she’s getting a bit better as time goes on. We got the shopping done and started on our way home, the traffic as you can guess by this point was a bit of a pain – another reason why I prefer not driving places after work on weekdays. But we eventually made it home, I think Kai is coming into one of her low periods she’s feeling a bit down at the moment and generally wants to be left alone. I’ve come downstairs, done the dishes, dinner is cooking and hopefully tonight we’ll put our feet up and just veg together, maybe I’ll manage to cheer her up maybe not but I’ll try and just let her know I’m here for her if she needs me. I’m not perfect and I can get damn cranky when I feel tired but hey I have a family and I can’t put me first all the time.